Durty Durty Triks

Ai notis Mom put a bowl on top of mai dry food & givved me xtra turkey/cheez.gravy flava nite b4 las'. W'en it come 2 nom, Ai not looking gif' horse n teh meowf. Nex' moarnin' Ai not hav 2 wake Mom & Poppa not home so Ai finking mebbe she just deside fur urly breffass. Hmm! NO BREFFASS! Wassup wit' taht?!!

Mom goes 2 baffroom bai hersef & not anser me. Ai'm finking she hurt n tehr? So Ai go bak 2 kichen & try 2 turn ober teh seramik bowl. It brokded so Ai has 2 lay low so Mom wont go n tehr & see it.

Mom lemme go owt fur moarnin pee/poo spot so Ai tries som grass fur breffass. But Ai frow it up on teh carport. Ai saw teh carrier las' nite but it wuz all pikked up fur putting me in wehn Ai camed n frum teh carport! OH! NO!

Ai put up gud fite b'cuz ushully Mom & PetGurl haz 2 wurk 2gedder 2 put me n tehre. Took a li'l longer but Mom got me N tehre. Ai haz no breffass & Ai wuz on mai way 2 teh (suspense song)--duh, duh, DAAAAH!----TO TEH VET!!!W'at a durty trik!

Ai yowld all the way! Tehn MOM LEF' ME TEHR!!! Ai wuz TOOO owt dun! Tehn w'le Ai wuz yowling fur Mom, Poppa, Petgurl,  Rownhed Boy,  Gramma, Stubby Kay SUMBUDDEEE! teh lites went owt. Ai waked up bak in mai carrier & teh vet wuz looking at me. Ai cudnt say nuffin but lay tehre finking awrful fots abot her. Tehn Ai bak 2 sleep.

W'en Ai waked up agin, Mom wuz tehre & she put mai carrier bak n the car. Ai tried 2 yowl but Ai wuz feelin' fuzzy on teh nsides. Mai teef! Mai teef feel diff'rent!AI need water! Ai needs FOOD! Teh car tek us sumplace wher PetGurl gits n teh car & she holds teh carrier n her lap so she kin pet me frew teh door.. Ai feel betta wit' PetGurl n tehre b'cuz Ai'm kinda upset wit' Mom ober teh durty trik.

Ai git home & Poppa's tehre wit' purlenty ov turkey gravy flava n mai bowl. Ai eat. Ai drink water. Ai eat. Ai drink water. Ai eat Ai drink water. Mai teef feel funny but reeely clean.